Deja Vu

So, a lot of you have been wondering how things went with good old Craig, my first match.com date. (As it turns out, he wasn't technically my first date, but more on that later.) To recap, this was the guy who looked a little bit different in each of his photos, and I was curious to see which one would show up. I think that's where we left it.

As it turned out, none of them did. The guy who met me out looked different from all the photos he'd posted, mostly in that he was shorter and older-looking than I'd thought he would be. And I have to say--it was strange to see him in person, and I kind of drew a blank at first on whether or not I found him attractive. I guess my mind was too busy reconciling what I was expecting with what was in front of me. For those of you who have never met someone with whom you first communicated online and on the phone, I gotta tell you--it's just weird, or at least, I find it to be a little weird. You know something about the person, you have a feel for who they are in a general sense, and you may have had some very specific conversations with this person . . . and then all of a sudden, there they are, and you need to piece together this physical person with the mental image you have of the personality you've come to know. It's a little disconcerting.

So, I wasn't sure what I thought of Craig physically at first, so I figured we'd hang out, talk a while, and then it would all become clear. As it turns out, this was a very good plan, because it did become clear, very quickly. It became clear that Craig is exactly like Guy #5 in
this post.

Again, I have to ask--what is it with me and gay guys who don't know/accept that they're gay? And what is it, especially, with guys in their 30s who are still like this? Then again, maybe it's not me--maybe a lot of women in the dating pool encounter this type of guy now and then, just by virtue of playing the numbers.

Lest you think I'm jumping to conclusions about Craig, let me say that I spent a big chunk of the date being regaled with stories about the time he spent in a traveling theater group. This group specialized in campy remakes of serious movies--for example, "Carrie," in which he played John Travolta's character. In one production, he had to make out with this other guy on stage every night, and it was hilarious! At one point, he found it necessary to reassure me, "I was the only straight guy in the group!" And you, dear reader, can just imagine me sitting there, with my head cocked slightly to one side, thinking, "Are you sure?"

But don't worry, all's well that ends well. We had a nice enough time and a good dinner, and all the time I spent pondering how I was going to graciously get out of a second date was for naught, because he didn't contact me again. I was a little surprised by that, actually, because he did make a good show of expressing interest in me, but ultimately I was relieved.

So, that was the first date, sort of--not a success, but not a horror story. Just another one of those things that make you wonder what people are thinking, and doing, and why so many people don't seem to really know what they want. But I guess that's why we're all out there looking, right?