Where to start?

Does anyone else out there feel like they will never, ever get totally organized? Do you feel like you'll ever get to the point where you think, "O.K., now I've got everything set just right, and I can start exploring new things and really put my heart into it?" Because I'm slowly coming to the realization that this is never going to happen for me, and the only question remaining is, can I live with this?

O.K. that in and of itself is a stupid question--of course I can live with it. I'm not going to kill myself over the fact that I'm probably never going to go through the unpacked boxes in my basement, or that it's a pretty safe bet that my entire house will never be completely clean all at the same time. The question is, will I ever get to the point where I accept this fact of life and don't obsess about it constantly?

I wonder about this all the time--how do people manage to get things done, on any kind of consistent basis, while carrying on with their day-to-day requirements/activities? Because, despite not even having kids, I never seem to have time to really get on top of . . . well, anything. I manage to maintain a lifestyle where I don't live in filth, get most of my bills paid on time, and, with some effort, can track down some important paperwork when needed. But I always feel like I'm barely hanging on as far as all that goes. For example, if someone asked me to produce my passport right this very moment . . . well, I could produce it by the end of the night, probably. But right off the top of my head? I'm just not sure where it is. Ditto for my Social Security card. Last year's tax documents. This year's tax documents. My dog's vet records. My 401K information. (How much, exactly, do I have saved for retirement thus far? Couldn't tell you.) It's all just too much.

I do wonder sometimes, though, exactly where the time goes. What if I came up with a plan, in which I totally clean and/or organize one thing per night, until I'm all caught up? Good plan, huh? Yeah, that's never gonna happen.

Tonight, for example. I tried to set a goal of cleaning the bathroom. That's the one thing I set out for myself to accomplish before the day was over. Simple, right? Easily accomplished? Well, here's how my day went:

7:00-6:00: Work. Yes, I am working 11-hour days right now, minimum. Doesn't help much as far as accomplishing anything else goes.

5:30-7:00: Talk to a friend on the phone. (Obviously, this overlapped with working. I'm trying to multitask my many responsibilities.)

7:00-7:30: Mess around on the computer a bit. (Note that with the new Mac, I could be doing this 24 hours a day and still wouldn't make a significant dent in exploring the possibilities of my new computer. More on this later.)

7:30-9:00: Walk the dog. We started off at the park, with all of our fellow dog-walking friends, where we stayed for about half an hour. Then, it was such a beautiful evening, we just had to go on an extended walk. It was gorgeous and peaceful.

9:00-now: Got home and realized I had absolutely no desire to clean the bathroom--I just wanted to write. Also realized I'd totally neglected to eat dinner. Also, I'm tired. There's not going to be any bathroom cleaning tonight . . . so when? There's a whole new to-do list for tomorrow night (basically, laundry), which means bathroom cleaning will happen . . . when? I really don't know.

Other people manage to clean their bathrooms and get other shit done. How?? I'd love to know. Of course, maybe most of them don't have blogs . . . .