I need to hire a cleaning service. Seriously.

[Note: I know I've been egregiously (happy, S?) negligent in updating the blog lately. So busy. Work, vacation, and the usual summer activities . . . and just a general lack of motivation, I suppose. But, things have slowed down a bit, and I'm back in the mood, so the blog should be getting some attention in the near future. In the meantime, here's a post I wrote a few weeks ago and didn't post because I wasn't quite satisfied with it, but anyway, I'm putting it out there now. More very, very soon--promise.]

O.K., so in a few days I'm leaving for my Wisconsin trip (which, in case you don't know, I'm doing instead of my Guatemala trip--long story). And I have SO MUCH shit to do. So much. Ever get to that point where there's just so much friggin' stuff to do that you're totally overwhelmed, and you just blow it all off? Welcome to my world!

So, my original intention was to get up early and get started on my long list of tasks immediately. Unfortunately, I had failed to actually make a list--which, having such a list really does help me get motivated. So I woke up, started thinking about everything I had to do, couldn't decide where to start, and instead spent the morning reading, watching T.V., talking on the phone, and fooling around on the computer. Sigh. I did manage to get the dishes done (and there were a lot of them). But then I looked around the rest of the apartment, and all motivation just drained out of me. I hate cleaning. I have limited free time that I would rather not spend cleaning. I can afford a cleaning service. Therefore, I should just hire a damn cleaning service already, right? Right.

For me, though, this seemingly simple solution is problematic on several levels. First, I'm not sure I want someone I don't know in my apartment when I'm not there. I'm not so much worried about theft--it's more about my animals, and in some respects, my privacy. I'm sure, for example, that Josie would be fine and wouldn't attack someone who came in to clean, but I'm not crazy about the idea of her getting comfortable with strangers coming into the house when I'm not here. Also, I know that when I'm cleaning, my cats tend to get in the way a lot. I say something to them and they generally move, or I gently move them . . . but what's to stop a cleaning person from kicking them out of the way? (I know, I know--I'm being paranoid and overly sensitive about the cats. Can't help it. That tiny, bleating maternal instinct within me has to come out somehow.)

And then there's the whole privacy thing. If I'm not there, what's to stop a cleaning person from, say, looking in my nightstand? Digging through drawers and closets? Etcetera? I mean, the temptation is too great for a lot of people to resist. And here's the point where I'm supposed to say, "I have nothing to hide, but. . . . " Bullshit. Everyone has something to hide, or at least, something (or things) in their house that they'd rather strangers not see. (And if you don't, I feel sorry for you--you may need to spice up your life a bit.)

In an alternative scenario, if I have the person come when I'm home . . . well, that's no better. What am I supposed to do while this person is scrubbing my toilet? Read a magazine? Watch Law & Order? Talk on the phone while they listen to my conversation? I just think that would be so awkward.* (And maybe there's a bit of middle-class guilt going on here too. I think this is one of those luxuries that I never pictured myself indulging in. I could probably get over that part, though.)

So, what to do? Well, one thing's for sure--I doubt I could get anyone to come out TODAY and clean my house. Which means I should probably face reality and get to work. Or, instead, I could write a match.com blog entry update. Hmmm. . . .

(*I was talking about this very issue with a friend recently, actually, and this friend was in agreement with me, so I don't think I'm being too weird/paranoid about this. And to that friend--I miss you! Call me!)